Wait a min. Did she just say that she is glad that I am getting
my share of crap? Isn't she meant to be all positive and sunny
and make me feel good about there being rainbows and puppies
around every corner?
Yes. To both. I do wish for you rainbows and puppies, of course I do. If I could wave my magic wand and keep your magic and good stuff in overflow I totally would. But I know the secret and that is why I am glad you are getting a plate full of both.
When all is good and you are in the flow, when all things are coming to you with ease and bringing with them nothing but joy, you know that you want more of the same. It's clearly a pattern that is working for you and it's easy to be very aware of the good things in your experiences. Conversely, when you are standing smack dab in the middle of a lot of stress and dark crap, it's sometimes hard to see the gift that is being given to you. And you may not want to hear that there is a gift in there somewhere, but there is. And though you may not be able to see it just now, you will see it eventually. The simple acknowledgment of it's being crap is a part of your growth process too and it's helping to get you to your better place.
How do you know you don't like asparagus unless you have tasted it? Now that you have tasted it you can decide that you don't want to eat it ever again. But before then it would just be a guess and not something that you could have complete clarity about. That is how we narrow down the list of all possible desires to the ones that are right for us. Exactly the same way your mom had you try different vegetables in order for you to know what there was on offer and decide what it is that you wanted more of. The Universe too, has a buffet of experiences on offer to you. By having an experience you gain insight as to what feels good for you, what you can say taught you something about yourself that made you who you are today, what you would like more of and what you tasted once but never will again.
In no way am I saying that you need to try every single type of experience that the Universe has to offer to anyone ever, in order for you to know that there are some things that you do not want to try. You don't need to try to be a drug addict living on the streets in fear in order to know that that is not a buffet item you are interested in. Yet a little bit of crap can do us some good.
So you see, we do need both. And that makes the less good stuff valuable even though it doesn't feel good. Move through it. Learn what you needed to learn. Close the chapter and know that you have been there, done that, had that experience and now you know with certainly that you don't need to repeat that one again. Its kind of the way most of us feel about high school. We did it. We learned a lot. Some of it was fun, some of it was crap. We are glad we did it, but we know that we learned what we needed to learn, and that we don't want to do it again.
So now what? Is she saying that I am meant to embrace with
open arms the stress and crap in my life, 'cause there is X, Y Z
happening and I don't want to embrace any of that.
Not quite. I am not asking you to be untrue to yourself or to try to love something that you have already decided is not serving you. What I am suggesting is that there may be something in there somewhere that is good for you. It might be disguised or buried deep, and it may be tough to see, but figure out what it is. Learn whatever it is that this person or experience has been brought to you to teach you. Find a certain appreciation for that part as it has been a key player in your own personal expansion. Take that part with you and leave the rest.
Now that you have tasted this menu item tell the Universe whether or not you want more of it on your plate. If not then look at it like asparagus. You tried it and now you can, with clarity, cross it off the list of items that you want served at your party and move on. Use this time to focus yourself on asking for what it is that you DO want, and let that be the geography in which your mind lives.
What stressful dark crap have you dealt with that you can now see as having done you a kindness in the long run? Is there something that you have done that you know was integral in making you the awesome person that you are today, but that you have zero desire in ever doing again? Without focusing on that crap but on the gift that was hidden in it, share your story below and maybe help another who is going through something similar now to see their hidden gift.