Monday, 29 July 2013

It Was A Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I had a bad day. Yep. Life Coaches have those too. It was a no good, terrible, horrible, very bad day. (Do you remember that book from your childhood???)  So many things were going wrong that I can't even recall exactly what happened first. Coffee was split in the car. I was late to an appointment. I couldn't find the specialty decor shop I was looking for. The emails that "needed attention" flooded my in box. A 1-800 number kept calling my cell phone (that really urks me). The list goes on. By the end of the day there was a part of a burnt dinner in the trash can, paint on the kitchen floor, a band aid on my left hand and two bruises on my legs. I was obviously so disconnected from my Self. I was rushing to get things done. My focus was not on anything but the list of things that I had to do. WOW. By the end of the day I was exhausted.

As always, as I brush my teeth and go through the rest of my end of day bookend routine, I review parts of my day and look for the things for which I am grateful to have had show up in my day. Usually I have no trouble making a long list of awesome. But today I was so exhausted and seemed to be struggling to find examples of awesome in my day. In fact, after a few minutes, I had to laugh. 

My day had been so hectic. Right from the moment I woke up. I hadn't had a day like that in a long time. Why now??? Why today??? What had I done wrong???  

I hadn't done anything wrong. I hadn't done anything at all actually. Nothing that would center or ground my energy. Nothing that set my personal cruise control to where I like it to be. I hadn't taken a moment to catch my mojo mid stream and switch it up. I had not gone inside myself and connected to that part of me that flows the days events in an easy breezey way.  What I HAD done were things that don't serve me. I had complained and gotten caught up in the outside world.  I had indulged myself in lower level emotions and let them grow. I had focused on the troubles and the annoyances of the day. 

Ah-ha! I am thankful for my whole messed up, crazy, no good, terrible, horrible, very bad day. I had skipped my morning bookend routine. The one where I set myself up to be able to flow with whatever the outside world should bring to me this day.  I had rushed. I had missed. I had skipped. I had thought that I was "good enough" to keep going and not bother. Just this once. Turns out, the power in my routines is real. And if I had ever questioned what I have found to work for me.... The Universe just back that up too. I was just shown, all day long, how LOA is real and working in both directions. It will bring you more of whatever you are thinking about and it can do it immediately.  Hence my day. 

I am back on track now. I woke this morning and remembered yesterday. I let that moment be brief. Yesterday is history and it need not hold any power over the bright and shinny new of today. My morning routine was not skipped today. I have taken those precious and important steps to setting myself up to be successful in my day. And I am already feeling so much better than I felt at any moment yesterday.  I got the message and I am focused both inwardly and forward. 

Ever had "one of those days"???  Are you able to catch your mojo mid stream and switch it up??? How do you do that??? What tools are working for you and do you always remember to use them???  I would love to hear your story. I invite you to share, inspire another and allow yourself to be inspired by the stories of others.  Use the comment section below or join the conversation over on Facebook.

Monday, 22 July 2013

Sad - Bad Moods Can Be Good For You

OK. So.....I know that part of my job is to help my clients choose their words and their feelings and to learn to embrace what is positive.  In fact that is a huge part of creating new habits that serve you well. But what about the days when you really are feeling like a big sack of poo. What is one meant to do with those days???

Well my friend. Those days are for real too. They are just as real as the good ones. I know that that is not what many of my clients expect to hear form me. It seems that they fully expect me to say that "down days and sad feelings are not OK, and that we should wrap them up in rainbows and let them melt away within the power of Love". Or something as equally weird and crazy as that. But that really isn't true, and I will never teach the power of positive anything without explaining the authenticity of both sides and everything that there is in between.

So you have a few bad days. Or maybe you are having more than a few. No need to engage the panic button just yet. Don't worry. These days and emotions that seem so prevalent now don't have to remain in a leading role in your future. And they aren't anything to be afraid of. They, in fact, hold a lot of wisdom. 

Wait a min. What????  How can that be??? What kind of wisdom could there possibly be in my sad mood???  

Lots. You just have to know that it is there to be seen.  

You see my friend your emotions are messages. What your sad really is, is the greater part of you - the part of you that is connected to God, The Universe, Source - telling you that on this subject, the direction of your thoughts are facing you is not the direction of your greatest well being. 

Its kind of like playing that "HOT & COLD" game you played as a kid.  The goal is to find your life purpose and the great feelings that come along with it. Your emotions is your all knowing buddy telling you how close you are to the good feeling spot. Sad is like them telling you that you are freezing cold. Brrr. As you move up the emotional scale you are getting warmmm-er, warmmm-er, warmmm-er..... 

So you are facing in the direction you are now and feeling crummy (your buddy is telling you that you are cold).  That's OK. Decide that this direction of thought and possible outcome is no longer comfortable. Decide to try another direction and see if your buddy tells you that you are warmmm-er. Pay attention to your emotions. 

Good News! You know what is going on inside your head and you know if you like how that feels. You know if this is the direction you want or not. If you DO like what you have go going on, then great. Stay put. But if you think that there might be something better out there, then go down the list of possibilities and start trying a few of them on for good feeling size.  You can already cross at least this one off of your list of maybes. One set of thoughts that you know isn't serving you. (I do so love crossing things off of any list) And there it is!! There is the wisdom

Knowing that one of the many possible directions is not what you want and crossing it off of your list of possible directions has just shortened the list.  You are getting closer to knowing what it is that you DO want and what DOES serve you. Ah, closer. You are on your way! Congratulations!

Now that you have got your mojo flowing, keep going. Try another approach to this same topic. Are you getting warmm-er... warmm-er... warmm-er???  Either you can now cross another set of possibles off of your list, or maybe you have found the exact right one. 

It took me years of serious and constant depression and then a lot of years of ups and downs, that were really mid-levels and downs more than they were ups and downs, to figure out that out.  I spent years dwelling on my sad and expecting it to be a huge part of my future.  It took some real effort on my part to first want to find a way out and then to actually be open to and seek that way out. A bad mood or a sad day used to be a very scary place but now its a knowing that I have some more growing to do. Or that I am not quite ready to deal with a subject.  Or that this just simply isn't the road I want and I can cross this thought off of my list of possibilities. "Been there - done that - no thank you" And I find myself one step closer to finding the road that I do want to travel.

For the record - I am loving the road I find myself on now. 

What about you? Is this idea new to you? What do you think? Can you think of how you might remind yourself to look for the wisdom next time you are feeling a lower level emotion?  Or have you used your sad as a learning tool before? If you have I would love to hear about how it. Help inspire another by leaving your story here in the comments section or share with us on my Facebook page. 

Monday, 15 July 2013

You Don't Have to Be Ready, But You Do Have to Start

Much advice has been offered to me about beginning a new career and about being ready for that beginning. "Start before you are ready".  That always seems to be the advice that is given.  Well, I am not ready. Not on all levels anyway. So I guess now is the time.  Does that actually make any sense????

There is a lot to consider when taking on any new project or biz venture.  Social media (not as simple as one who has not used it for more than fun might think), web design, logos, photography, and then there is the actual web content. And we haven't even talked about the actual client time yet. WOW! How do you attract new clients without those things but how do you do all of those things without a strong steady investment of clients, cash and time.

It has seemed for a long time like starting a coaching practice that was more than just a part time hobby to accompany my full time job was a bit of a pipe dream. OR a lot of one.  But then it occurred to take a slightly different perspective on the "start before you are ready" advice.

I was watching, well not really watching but I was in the room while a documentary about the WWF (World Wrestling Federation) was on the TV.  I am not a girl who really cares much about wrestling but I happened to have one ear open while the GIANT man in tights offered a surly piece of wisdom.  He said you had to be in it to win it.  He of course was talking about acquiring some kind of giant golden belt in a Wrestlemania cage match, but his advice is solid - "You Have To Be In It To Win It."

What he was saying is that he would never win the match and wear the belt if he didn't get into the ring.  The belt was his symbol of success. He had to start wresting and risk a few bruises in order to make it to his success point.  He couldn't wait until he had all of the practice and the workouts behind him, those are all a part of getting there.  My success isn't symbolized by any giant accessory, but like my friend in tights, I too need to be in the action in order to make any gains. Things don't need to be set up before I can start. Some things do, but not everything. With so much to be considered and the rate at which the internet is changing how we connect, "Ready" to me feels like a white bunny that I could always be chasing. There is room for me to grow and move towards my success points along the way, WHILE I am "doing it".

I have now officially put myself into the game. Its the only way for me to move towards what I want, which is to use the life experiences and the learning that I have to help as many others as I can to and discover and create more of what is their good stuff.  It's not an easy road and having a coach there for the journey would have been helpful while I was doing it. Helping another along their road is and will be a great way for me to give back to the Universe in gratitude for all of the wonderful blessings I have found. I am in the game and I am here to make a difference.

What about you? Are you in it to win it or are you sitting on the side lines watching others go for it? How does it feel for you to be in the game as opposed to on the bench? What kinds of things have you done to help yourself move past the fear of putting yourself out there and getting in it? I'd love to hear about what you have tried and what works for you.

Use the comment section below or find me on FacebookTwitter or Google+ to share your story. 

Monday, 8 July 2013

Getting Out There to "Carpe This Diem" Can Sometimes Mean Sitting Down

Getting out there and really grabbing a hold of the day is a great feeling.  We have all had those days when even in the middle of it all, you have an awareness of how on fire you are. You are solving problems, finishing projects, cleaning up and getting it done! A real sense of accomplishment in your day feels great.  Do something that you have been meaning to get to. Maybe clean out that drawer in the kitchen, or maybe paint that piece of furniture that's been crying out for some TLC for years, take that drive into the country or spend some quality time with that book that a well intentioned you put on your night table to collect dust.

If you are reading this post that means that you woke up on the right side of the dirt today and that you have a day ahead of you that is full of possibility.  I invite you to shake it up just a little.  Let go of a few of your "shoulds", the dishwasher can wait. Try adding something to your day that is on your enjoyable list of wants instead. We spend so much time looking at what we still need to do to get to where we want to be, that sometimes we can forget about the awesome of where we are.  I have been guilty of that all week long.  But not anymore. I am putting my foot, and my paint brush, down and I am going to enjoy a little of what is already done.

For the past 6 weeks my living room has been piled full of furniture waiting to be assigned its new home.  We could have just moved it in to the rooms where it is destined. But the rooms, and the furniture, need paint.  And so we waited.  But with work schedules being as busy as they were for a few weeks, nothing happened.  The furniture sat, the chaos grew, and what had begun feeling like an adventure began to feel heavy instead. That heavy took a tole on my whole self.  Thanks to the help of Karen Hillfman-Millson, a great coach and fantastic friend, I saw that the timing of my recent exhaustion and lack of creativity was closely tied to the mess in the living room.

I knew what I wanted and letting it just sit in wait was holding back more than just the transformation of rooms, it was holding ME back. And since it was now clear that nothing was going to paint and move itself into place.... I took action.

It's been a busy week but the living room is live-able. One bedroom and its furniture have been painted and a beautiful space created.  A second bedroom has drywall mud drying and awaiting its turn for colour. Two other rooms have furniture rendering them useful spaces, their beautifying transformations await - and perhaps will wait until the fall, but I can breath again now.  My space is back to feeling like an adventure. The heavy chaos has been lifted.  It took some conscious and dedicated effort to move the project forward, but then I just had to let the ripple effects that had poured into all areas of my life do the same again.  Only this time for the good.

I am on a role. I could keep going.  I am guilty of having a mojo flowing that wants it all done now - or yesterday even.  I easily focus on the projects that lay ahead.  Lord knows there are a lot of them. But I can almost hear Karen asking me how I feel about what was accomplished last week. Good question Karen, one I would ask to my clients too. Karen - I feel so good that I want more. Which is amazing, yes I know. So lets hit the pause button for a moment.  It was fun doing it. Let's not rush through the fun. Let's bask a little. Enjoy it in each stage. Carpe this diem and make a change for the good, I absolutely recommend that.  But lets also carpe this opportunity to enjoy the diem and the journey and not work to so hard that we forget to engage in what is now. I am loving what I see. Full stop. Pause. Just love this moment for a moment, and THEN reengage in this awesome feeling of accomplishment and keep going.

I invite and encourage you to get up off of your butt and do something that feels good for you and moves your forward. And then sit back down and enjoy it as it is in your now. Then get up again and continue the cycle. Both the doing and the enjoying of what has been accomplished are a part of what makes its all feel like the adventure that you are here to have.

Do you have projects that you would feel good about enjoying the accomplishment of? Do you remember to bask in what you have already created or are you guilty of the same "let's get 'er done" mojo that I am? How do you keep yourself from getting caught up in that?